my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
A bitchslap is in order.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
