They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It was confusing and full of hummus
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize