And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
