She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
So squirting runs in the family.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
