You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize