Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
