If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Barsexuality is the new black.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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