I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize