I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
