Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize