Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
ttyl tear gas
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
