Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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