Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize