thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
