Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
They have beer where we have blood.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
