bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
