Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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