Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
