the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I look better un-naked...
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
