There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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