I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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