That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
tell me about the eggs
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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