id be glad to
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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