I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
