You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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