Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize