If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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