Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
one might say we're banned from that church
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
