If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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