i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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