Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
