you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
