at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
