I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
