I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
