U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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