And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
