I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
