Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
