before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
