I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize