i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
