this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
