Whod you bang
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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