I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
