pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
