ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
