did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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