Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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