I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
